The Critic's Report on OnRamps and Detours Forum

I had been waiting in great anticipation to attend last week's OnRamps and Detours Forum at Bentley College in Waltham, MA. This forum was to be the "meeting of the minds" for women in the boston area on the topic of women returning to the workplace after taking a career break to care for their families. I couldn't wait to hear what was going to be said. There would be Keynotes, break-out sessions and rubbing elbows with local women in business. What could be better for a budding Working Families' Issues politician such as myself?
(cue the Star Spangled Banner, please)

Bright-eyed and somewhat bushy-tailed (I could have used more coffee and a printer that actually printed out my directions which ended up making me a little late), I practically ran into the Executive Dining Room at Bentley College. Bentley is a gorgeous small campus school that is known for Business and Financial studies. The first up was keynote speaker Sheila Lirio Marcelo, Founder and CEO of Care.com. They are a wonderful solution that helps families find quality child and elder care. I listened intently to her story of how and why she started her company. She is a vibrant, tidy intellectual who knows how to deliver a motivational talk. I was entranced, she was me I was thinking, right up until she started talking about her hours worked per day. A mere 12-15 did she say? Wow, that is a lot of hours spent at the office. I checked my program, she did have children, right? Doing my math, factoring in my hellish commute and hours my daughter spends sleeping that would equate to zero hours spent with Carli during the week. That's right, I said zero.

I was thinking she was the exception to the norm, unfortunately I was wrong. Plenty of women who spoke that day were working long hours, some had full-time nannies, or travelled very often. By very often I mean at least a week to sometimes two each month. Oh my stars!

I had recently turned down two job opportunities because I was required to be travelling a minimum of 5-7 times a quarter. That really means 5-7 times as long as nothing else comes up. That comes out to 7-9 times a quarter because, let's face facts, with Client Management something always comes up. Were the salaries sky-scraper high? You bet they were! I was just not willing to be away from my family that often no matter what they paid. To me, it just wasn't worth it. My pursuit is to help educate employers to get their heads around the idea of work/life balance not "say good bye to your family".

I realize not everyone shares my thoughts on travel and hours worked. Here is my conundrum. Do these mother/leaders in business offer real work/life balance solutions at their workplaces given that their sense of balance and involvement may be a bit skewed in light of their back-breaking schedules? I hope so, I really hope so. Otherwise, we really aren't offering much hope. It is up to us, gals, to make a better place in business for our daughters, should they choose to have children and also a career. I am convinced you can still do both. Do both sides have to give to make it work? Yes, they do. You can't pour two 2-litre bottles into a 16-ounce glass and not have a lot of spillage and mess! The point is, and I will pseudo-quote Sheila of Care.com here, you have to accept imperfection. If you want to do it perfectly, just save yourself a lot of frustration and accept that you won't. And it's okay.

Overall, the forum was wonderful. The forum's creator Meghan McCartan, was engaging, smart and amazingly hospitible despite running around like a crazy person, making sure everything was going smoothly. (I think Mom's have a PhD in that though) She brought together some great talent and tremendous role models who had very relevant things to say. The caliber of attendee was also outstanding. The group was big enough but not too large to be intimidating.
Well, done indeed, Meghan. One thing I would like to see is some Mom Business Leaders speak about successful Work/Life Balance programs for next year. I really don't feel like that happened last week.

Some sites of mention:

www.onrampsforum.com -find out more about an OnRamps forum in your area
www.forms4parents.com -founded by an attorney, legally sound agreements for childcare
www.educationandjuvenilelaw.com -specializing in Special Education law and consultation